Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Primal scream therapy.....

I think I could have used some yesterday. I really wonder if it works. My guess is probably not because even after you managed to shatter the eardrums of those in close proximity whatever it is that caused you to want to scream in the first place will still be there.

I'm conflicted. I'm sad. I'm angry. I'm frustrated. I know there must be tons of people out there who share how I feel. You bust your butt to do a good job everyday. You do your best because it's who you are. You try not to let all the other stuff around you get you down. And then one day it all comes crashing down. All that suppressed anger and frustration finally manages to reach the surface and all you want to do is hit something...really, REALLY hard. Either that or you want to tell the person who is responsible for letting the demon loose to just shove it or kiss your ass. But you can't. Because that would be burning bridges...bridges that are necessary right now. And so you try to find a way to get back to your happy place. My happy place just happens to be closed for renovations right now. So what am I to do?

I'm trying really hard not to make any snap decisions but all I want to do is say F*CK IT! Is it worth it to be this unhappy?

I have today off. I'm going for a massage. I think I'll exercise the option to take the rest of the week off to try to find some perspective.

Maybe I'll even try some primal scream therapy.

2 comments:

one-eared pig said...

I understand completely! Growing up my mother told me to always be the bigger person. But what if I want to be the smaller person and just throw a hissy fit?

I hope your massage was very soothing!

Dzign by Jamie said...

Understandable. Tomorrow is another day. You will rise above it all. HUGS!!